Valley Momstag:www.nvdaily.com,2009-08-12:/moms/1862010-12-24T15:44:04ZMovable Type Pro 4.31-enHere's to a year of special familiestag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.985312010-12-27T05:00:00Z2010-12-24T15:44:04ZWhile I'm grateful for such an awesome opportunity to get to share a little bit of my life every week, as the year draws to a close, I'd like the spotlight to shine on some of the other incredible families we've met this year. My biggest privilege here at the Daily is getting to know some of them.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms Soon, The Northern Virginia Daily will publish its special section of the year's top worldwide and local news stories.
In my own world, the top stories are more likely to include the many milestones my son has achieved this year -- first words, first steps, first trip to the ocean -- than anything that happened on Capitol Hill or in a foreign land.
For most of the year, I've had this space to share a lot of that with you, and as a result, many of you have shared your own family stories with me or even simply just said "I've been there, too."
While I'm grateful for such an awesome opportunity to get to share a little bit of my life every week, as the year draws to a close, I'd like the spotlight to shine on some of the other incredible families we've met this year. My biggest privilege here at the Daily is getting to know some of them.
Like the Downs family of Warren County. Lynn Down's 13-year-old son, Christian, was born prematurely and later diagnosed with cerebral palsy. Despite his challenges, Christian defied doctors by learning to walk and today is thriving.
Rather than sulk, the family credits the March of Dimes for Christian's progress and in 2010 gave back as the commonwealth's March of Dimes ambassador family.
"What I'm doing it for is what I really like," Christian said back in March. "A lot of kids are not being born premature because of what I'm doing."
Other families have taken in strangers, like the Elledges of Edinburg, who opened their home to Kosovo native Larush Ramosaj, who is seeking an American education in hopes of serving others.
"I'm impressed with his dedication to making a positive impact on the world, and especially his country, and the faith that these things are going to happen ... the faith that he'll get back to his country some day and he'll make a difference in the welfare of the people," Elledge said.
Winchester doctor Irfan Galaria had the support of his family in the days following a devastating earthquake in Haiti: He traveled there to help create a medical clinic to treat the wounded.
"I think what I will remember most is clearly this is a very tragic situation, but I was very impressed with how people have come together to collaborate and do what they need to do to help the people of Haiti. I saw a situation where people who have never met each other before were taking care of each other like brothers because they were all working for a common goal," he said.
Also in the pages of the Daily, we've met too many families to list who have battled rare illnesses and lost loved ones to diseases, accidents and fires. Their losses break our hearts, but the support the community offers shines as a bright spot in dark moments.
Every day, families here in the valley overcome adversity, show grace even in tragedy and inspire others with acts of kindness.
I look forward to getting to read about and maybe tell some more stories of the valley's incredible families in 2011. Here's hoping there will be less tragedy and more good fortune, and that we'll spend more time with family but also be inspired to serve others.
Happy new year! • Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Holiday ads try to sell baloneytag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.979122010-12-20T05:00:00Z2010-12-17T21:56:26ZA History Channel special the other day reported that Santa has pitched everything from department stores to cigarettes since he first started showing up in advertisements however many years ago. There are countless other gimmicks out there as well, like the big red bow atop a luxury vehicle or carolers heralding the latest sale or gadget.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms A History Channel special the other day reported that Santa has pitched everything from department stores to cigarettes since he first started showing up in advertisements however many years ago. There are countless other gimmicks out there as well, like the big red bow atop a luxury vehicle or carolers heralding the latest sale or gadget.
New families hang Hallmark ornaments on the tree, and Santa, with glowing cheeks and a twinkle in his eye, manages to sneak that much-hoped-for toy under it.
One TV ad on heavy rotation last year featured a woman rocking her baby. When her husband comes in and whispers, "Is she sleeping?" The woman replies: "Why are you up, it's 2 a.m.?" "It's 2 a.m. Christmas morning. It's our first Christmas as a family. I couldn't wait," he says, unveiling a box containing a flashy ring.
"Do you think she'll remember this Christmas?" the new father says of his baby. "I know I will," the mother whispers.
When I told everyone here in the office that this commercial -- viewed last year when I myself was at home with a new baby -- made me cry every time I saw it, I had a few people laughing so hard they were in tears themselves.
Still others (who shall remain nameless) urged me to write this week's column about "What drives me crazy about the holidays."
Clearly, Christmas isn't ever what it's cracked up to be in the TV spots or classic holiday specials. No guardian angel ever comes down to show us how wonderful life is, and our bosses usually don't have a spiritual awakening that moves them to send over anonymous turkey feasts or double last year's holiday bonuses.
Instead, we stress about finding (and affording) the perfect gifts, struggle with tape and wrapping paper and fight crowds at the last minute when we fail -- like we always say we'll never do again -- to beat the before-Christmas rush at the malls.
We end up eating too much, and seeing a little too much of loved ones.
And of course, we are reminded of those less fortunate, though we sometimes feel powerless to help.
A lot of the time, we just look forward to it all being over so we can relax again.
It's easy to see why some folks are cynical -- or Scrooge-like, if you will.
I guess it's best to look to the corny commercials and classic holiday films and cartoons for inspiration where we can, but take them with a grain of salt when they inspire more scoffs than warm and fuzzy feelings.
Being bombarded with idealistic -- or absurd -- visions of the holidays each season at least gives us something to laugh about. Or, if you're like I was last year, in the middle of a postpartum roller coaster ride, it even manages to tug a little at your heartstrings.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Holiday magic returnstag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.970052010-12-13T05:00:00Z2010-12-10T20:57:25ZThis time last year, my son was still a mere newborn.The most he could appreciate the holidays was to gaze for a few minutes at the colorful lights of a Christmas tree in between naps, feedings and diaper changes.So, last...Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms The most he could appreciate the holidays was to gaze for a few minutes at the colorful lights of a Christmas tree in between naps, feedings and diaper changes.
So, last year, my husband and I pretty much stuck to the same routine we had in all our years of marriage.
We had no holiday celebration at our own home -- no Christmas ham or opening of gifts from Santa on Christmas morning. No Bible reading of the birth of Jesus or recital of "The Night Before Christmas" -- not at our house, anyway.
We traveled to our hometowns, where we juggled trying to split our time evenly between the homes of our parents and grandparents over the course of a few days.
We spent as much time as we could spare at one gift-opening before slipping out to see other family after their holiday dinner. We had Christmas ham and turkey what seemed like four times in one day.
As always, we drove back home at the end of it all, exhausted, and with a car as loaded as Santa's sleigh.
Hearkening back to childhood, Christmas seemed a little more special -- and slow-paced. The season would begin with my dad dragging out the pieces of our artificial tree from the crawl space and letting it all "air out" for a day or so before we'd dim the lights in our living room and hang all the ornaments.
We'd always watch the Garfield Christmas special and "Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas," both of which my mom had recorded onto a VHS tape with a label featuring a little green Christmas tree drawn by my dad.
We'd exchange gifts among our Sunday school classmates and put on a Christmas play where we'd star as barn animals in Bethlehem or church mice, and we'd leave the Sunday service nearest Christmas with a Ziploc bag containing a Hershey bar, candy cane, apple, orange and pack of Wrigley's Doublemint gum.
Christmas Eve would be spent visiting grandparents, and Christmas Day was a day spent exclusively at home, awaking early to unwrap presents and spending the day assembling Lego masterpieces and dressing Barbies while my mom made dinner, with pecan pie for dessert, in the kitchen.
Now in my second holiday season as a mother, I'm finding it a real struggle to both honor the already-established traditions of our families and create my own for my son.
This year, he is old enough to pick ornaments off the tree and say "ho, ho, ho," but he still isn't big enough to worry about missing out on Santa at our house. So, we'll do what we've always done again, for the most part.
My husband and I took a special day off to be Santa's little shopping assistants, and I think we'll have a "Christmas morning" on New Year's Eve, since we'll be at our own house then. Next year, my son will have a whole new set of skills and level of understanding, and our Christmas traditions will take on more shape.
I'm sure in the Christmases to come there will be hiccups, frustration and disappointments, but the prospect of creating a little magic for the person who means the most in the world to me makes Christmas take on a whole new meaning again.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Babies bring on 'mama brain'tag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.959872010-12-06T15:16:53Z2010-12-06T15:20:32ZEach day my 13-month-old son confounds me with new skills I never even thought to teach him.He spins in circles to make himself dizzy, or picks up the hand motions to "Itsy, Bitsy Spider," at day care. He learns to...Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms He spins in circles to make himself dizzy, or picks up the hand motions to "Itsy, Bitsy Spider," at day care. He learns to point at the chicken on a page of a book and call it by its name. He figures out how to blow kisses and cover his eyes when he hears the phrase "peek-a-boo."
Unquestionably, the first few years of life are a time of unparalleled learning and discovery.
A quick Google search confirms what seems obvious: At no time does a human brain grow and develop more than in the first three years of life.
It is such an exciting time for the adults who have the pleasure of watching a child grow up. Babies and children are fascinating to watch, and to teach.
As my son gets smarter every day, however, it seems I'm going in the opposite direction. When my socks don't match, I'm running late or I lose my train of thought, anyone who has been there before is quick with a diagnosis: Motherhood.
I've heard others call it "mama brain." I started hearing the phrase during pregnancy, but later learned the hard way that it doesn't end when the baby is born. In fact, it's going strong with no signs of letting up, making it a little harder to focus on non-baby topics.
As mothers, women, including me, seem to be a little more forgetful, a little more emotional, and, yes, at times, a little less intelligent.
That's why I was surprised to read that a study released in October concluded that the brains of mothers "actually get bigger" in the months after giving birth.
According to a news release from HealthDay News about the study, this is as backward as it sounds. Adult brains don't typically get that much bigger without some major shift or even injury. But sure enough, women in the study showed "significant increases in gray matter volume in various parts of the brain."
All this time I thought my brain must be shrinking, and it was actually growing.
I read a little more into it, and my own observation turned out to be not far off: While new mothers' brains are, indeed, growing, the growth is occurring in certain parts of the brain more associated with "maternal motivation, reward and emotion processing, sensory integration and reasoning and judgment."
So it all begins to add up: Just the motherly parts are growing.
Babies change us in lots of ways -- my body is also certainly extremely different than it once was. It's just a little humorous and maybe oddly comforting to know that there is some science behind what's going on in our heads, as well.
It's a good thing for babies at least, because taking care of little ones takes lots of brain power. It's maybe not so good when it comes to all the other aspects of life.
As they say, though, life goes on. We mothers deal with being more loving, attentive and nurturing and get all the rest done, even if our brains are dedicating a little less energy to all that other stuff.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Gadgets from your childhood date youtag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.948772010-11-29T05:00:00Z2010-11-26T21:24:03ZUndoubtedly, all the Santas out there are well on their way toward sorting through holiday wish lists by now.The more organized ones might even have wrapped up shopping over the weekend. As for me, about as far as I've gotten...Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms The more organized ones might even have wrapped up shopping over the weekend. As for me, about as far as I've gotten is browsing once more through the thick catalogs and sales ads brimming with color photos of the season's hottest toys.
I managed to ignore them for years, but with a 1-year-old in the picture, toys are once more a part of life.
As I browsed through the pages recently, I was shocked to discover just how much things have changed since I last made my own list for Santa.
When I was first introduced to video games, for example, it involved pushing up, down, right, left and A, B on a Nintendo controller -- or using an Atari joystick. To get the games to work, you had to blow on them, jiggle them into just the right spot while pushing them down into the console or stick little pieces of paper in there to align everything just enough to get a picture. If you had told me then that when I grew up there would be a video game system that didn't even have a controller, but instead a sensor that tracks your body movements "making you the controller," well, I just don't know if I could have even imagined it.
Yet, that's what the Xbox 360 with Kinect does, apparently.
Other items I see in the catalogs are like mini laptop computers, or kid versions of Kindles and other e-readers. Undoubtedly, some of the more literary-minded young adults might be asking Santa for the Kindle itself.
If you had told me as I folded down the page to mark my place in "Little Women," or one of the books in R.L. Stine's "Fear Street" series, that there would be a little device that could instantly download a book and that at the push of a button you could highlight a favorite passage or look up the definition of a word, I couldn't have imagined that either.
I'm sure lots of kids also wrote Santa for an iPod, if they don't have one already.
When I was just old enough to really start listening to music, I'd listen to Casey Kasem's "American Top 40" on Sunday mornings, which was generally predictable enough that I could have the cassette tape at the right place and my finger on the "record" button in time to have my own copy of all my favorite songs.
I can remember when CDs first started spreading, my parents bought me one for Christmas -- Wilson Phillips -- and I was totally disappointed because aside from the one stereo at home in the living room, I had no way to even listen to it.
Now, kids even want and get their own computers. The first computer in my house was one I worked after school at Pizza Hut to raise the funds for. I paid over $1,000 for a desktop with only a fraction of the capabilities that a $300 laptop now offers.
The funny thing is that I'm not even that old, yet. But I can see it now that in the Christmases to come, to my son I will be ancient.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
A new 'Kid' is in towntag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.939832010-11-22T16:43:38Z2010-11-22T16:45:39ZWinchester stay-at-home mom Ashley Woods says there's only so much you can do to entertain a 2-year-old and a 3-year-old within the confines of home.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms "There's only so many times you can watch 'The Little Mermaid' on DVD on a rainy day," she says.
Any time you can get out with the whole family and spend time around other families and feel comfortable, it's a good thing, according to Ashley, who, like many other parents, wants her kids to experience all the world has to offer.
So, she has always scoured the area for ways to get them out of the house.
And now, her work stands to benefit others in her shoes.
Ashley is compiling a calendar of kid- and family-friendly activities in the Winchester area and sending it out to subscribers in an e-mail every Monday and posting it to her website.
What she is doing is actually part of a national movement I hadn't heard of called "Macaroni Kid."
The business was started by other moms similar to Ashley, according to its main website, national.macaronikid.com.
Macaroni Kid apparently allows one "publisher mom" in any given town to create her own version of Macaroni Kid specialized to her area.
When I talked to Ashley last week, she'd been running Macaroni Kid Winchester (online at winchester.macaronikid.com) for only 20 days and had already gotten 200 e-mail subscribers, four advertisers and 5,000 Web hits -- "and that number's just going to grow," she says.
These guys must be on to something.
Of course, Ashley says you only get out of it what you put into it, and she's putting a lot into it. She says so far she's visited online and in person many different places that offer activities for kids and families, and I've gotten her newsletter -- it's lengthy and includes upcoming events at the Youth Development Center, Handley Library, Winchester Parks and Recreation Department, Lowe's, local day care centers, churches and fire departments.
She likes to include a recipe and craft in the newsletter too, and other useful information for parents like links to websites.
Macaroni Kid Winchester is also offering a giveaway every week for things like purses and theater tickets, but the core to Macaroni Kid is letting parents know about events -- before they happen.
Already, Ashley has learned about a lot of places she wasn't familiar with.
"I knew there would be a lot to do but seeing it all in one place, it's like 'Wow, that's a lot,'" she says. "It's great that we have all those opportunities here for family activities."
So far the community has been very accepting, she says, and people are sending in events to her even as she is out looking for them. If it's family-friendly and open to the public, she includes it.
"It's definitely keeping me busy," she says.
Events can be submitted by e-mailing them to ashleyw@macaronikid.com and people can subscribe to the weekly newsletter by going to winchester.macaronikid.com and clicking on "subscribe me."
Of course, I'd be remiss not to add that we have similar goals here at the Daily and always welcome those who want to let us know about upcoming events.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Wasting time to save a dollartag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.928372010-11-15T05:00:00Z2010-11-12T21:37:42ZKeys, check. Store list, check. Purse, check. Baby, check. Now where did I put those two baby wipes coupons I clipped out of the paper?Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms Now where did I put those two baby wipes coupons I clipped out of the paper?
My husband and son stood ready to go out the door as I frantically ran around checking for all the places I might have put those dollar-off coupons.
On top of the fridge? Nope. With the bills? Nope.
Finally, I stopped myself.
If I knew I had two dollar bills lying around the house somewhere, would I insist on finding them before making our way out for our weekly shopping -- a trip that will at least cost us $60?
No, I told myself. I would not.
There's just something about knowing that this little slip of paper that cost nothing can save you a dollar off of something you're about to buy anyway.
There is a certain thrill that comes with saving money.
Scouring sales ads, collecting baby food labels or rewards codes -- they all make you feel like you're getting something for nothing. It's a nice feeling.
Probably a few years ago now I signed up for my check card's rewards program. For every dollar I spend with it I get points, which add up for rewards like cutting boards, movie tickets and even bicycles or luggage.
When I finally remembered to check if I had enough points to get anything, I was able to redeem a $25 Amazon.com gift card and one for $10 for Target . I felt like a million bucks. Of course, I had really spent thousands and thousands of dollars over the years on gas, groceries and other things for that extra $35, which only paid for a couple of books and a half pack of diapers.
The same thing goes with the Pampers rewards program. I bought probably six months worth of disposable diapers to finally earn my son a "My Pal Scout" from LeapFrog.
It seems to me that unless you're really careful, scouting for deals can end up costing you more than you would have ever spent to begin with.
You could end up buying razors you don't need just because there is a coupon, or buying the more expensive baby wipes just so you earn the extra rewards points.
Perhaps my most infamous mistake in this regard was buying four boxes of Eggo pancakes and waffles a few weeks ago from Martin's because they were included in their circular as part of the buy-six-of-these-get-200-bonus-points deal that goes toward getting a free Thanksgiving turkey.
One of my four must not have been the right flavor because I didn't get the points -- and now my son is probably wondering why I keep feeding him microwaved pancakes every morning.
Other times, I have truly saved by buying on-sale diapers coupled with coupons.
Ultimately, the important things seem to be a) be vigilant, b) plan your purchases in advance, and c) only buy things you'd buy anyway or actually need.
Your family might think you're crazy, but you can come out ahead if you actually watch what you're doing.
Do you have tips for saving your family money? Share them. • Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com ]]>
Babies have their own fads, lingotag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.917742010-11-08T05:00:00Z2010-11-05T20:22:03ZFor those of you would-be mothers, or maybe just those who haven't been around babies in several years, here are a few of the key words and phrases you may be missing out on.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms We played a game: List all the baby lingo you can think of. The one whose list is the longest wins.
Not having been around babies for years, I came up short. Really short. I think maybe I just declined to play, though I can't remember for sure.
Another young mother had a list of 40-something words: Things like paci, binky and ba-ba. Hearing all those words I had never heard before made me feel intimidated and ill-prepared for the journey I was wanting to begin.
Thankfully, pregnancy and the subsequent months spent with a newborn provide all the education one needs.
So, for those of you would-be mothers, or maybe just those who haven't been around babies in several years, here are a few of the key words and phrases you may be missing out on:
• Babywearing. OK, this one isn't new, but it seems to be hot, hot, hot. There are what seems like an infinite number of choices for baby carriers, slings, and wraps so that momma (or daddy) can strap on their baby and carry them around more or less hands-free. Many cultures have probably done this for hundreds or even thousands of years. Nonetheless, it's a term that moms these days are using a lot and companies are using to sell lots of products. When I was using a sling to help support the weight of my son a few months ago while shopping, an older lady commented how she wished they'd had things like that around when she was raising her children.
• Baby legs. A co-worker of mine first mentioned these to me, I think right after my son was born. Identical in appearance and purpose to the 1980s legwarmers trend, these colorful alternatives to pants are popular, cute and make diaper-changing involve fewer buttons.
• Boppy. Among pregnant and nursing women, this pillow seems to be overtaking the world. It's U-shaped so it wraps around the waist of the mother, offering a place for baby to lie while she breastfeeds. Some swear by them. I depended on them in the weeks following my son's birth. Now, the pillow just takes up space.
• Bumbo. Also the rage these days. The Bumbo seat is a molded foam chair that helps babies who can't quite sit up on their own do so. It is lightweight and convenient, but can be dangerous as there are no straps, and some babies (ahem, my own) learn to wiggle out of them at a surprisingly early age.
• Puffs. I've mentioned them on this page before, but they are basically a baby version of cereal that melts more quickly in your mouth. They come in a variety of brands and flavors, and some of my mommy friends have jokingly referred to them (as well as Mum Mums, which are kind of like a baby version of rice cakes) as "baby crack," because of their addictive nature among the in-diapers set.
Trends come and go. Some products make life easier and others just add to the expense of raising kids, but when it comes down to it, babies need the same things as they always have: milk, sleep, diapers and lots of love.
It's quite a trip, for sure, but it's well worth the ride.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com ]]>
Moms unable to afford diaperstag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.906992010-11-01T04:00:00Z2010-10-29T20:29:10ZAccording to a study done by Huggies this year, one in three American mothers struggles to provide diapers for their babies. This, the diaper brand concluded, can lead to babies being kept in wet, dirty diapers or even being made to wear used disposable diapers a second time.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms If you don't have the holiday spirit yet, you probably are at least feeling the pressure to get your holiday shopping -- and subsequent budget crises -- under way.
Among the essential Christmas shopping supplies like Scotch gift wrap tape and last year's gift bags, perhaps no item is more vital than a calculator. At least if you want to keep track of the damage, that is.
In my family, figuring out what we have to spend on Christmas is the big downer in a season that is supposed to be full of carols and cheer.
For others, crunching numbers is necessary on a daily basis for staples like groceries, toiletries, and for young families, even diapers.
According to a study done by Huggies this year, one in three American mothers struggles to provide diapers for their babies. This, the diaper brand concluded, can lead to babies being kept in wet, dirty diapers or even being made to wear used disposable diapers a second time. Many able families make the holidays a time to help others in need, donating turkeys or toys. Yes, the thought of a child with no toys under the tree is unpleasant, but, at least for me, the thought of a child wearing a soggy diaper for an extended period is outright heartbreaking.
And it's so much more than just a holiday-season problem.
Huggies, with support from March of Dimes and others, is currently running a national "Every Little Bottom" diaper drive.
Locally, one woman is on her own mission to make sure every mom has the diapers she needs. Jody Stephenson, as she put it, just got her 501(c)3 status, freshly minted from the IRS, for her organization The Red Wagon Ministry.
She is in her third year of collecting diapers, which she hands over to C-CAP of Winchester for distribution, she said during a recent phone interview. In her first year, she said, she collected about 10,000 diapers. She collected 1,000 in September.
Stephenson sets up her little display of angel-winged baby photos and red wagon at area churches and other organizations for a period of about a month to collect disposable diapers. Diapers, she points out, are a continuous need -- one that food stamps and Women, Infants and Children (WIC) assistance don't cover.
Disposable diapers in particular are needed because cloth diapers are not accepted at day care facilities or easily laundered in transient housing conditions, her organization's website says.
She credits a love of children and the calling of the Lord for leading her to the cause, and she wants to expand.
With her new nonprofit status, board of directors and young volunteers, Stephenson is hoping to grow her effort, find other organizations to distribute the diapers that she collects and maybe even take advantage of the Huggies program to draw some of those donated diapers to the valley.
Elsewhere in the valley, Healthy Families Shenandoah County and Healthy Families Northern Shenandoah Valley (covering Frederick and Clarke counties and Winchester) also accept diaper donations, according to United Way of the Shenandoah Valley.
For more information about diaper need and how to help, check out the following websites: • www.everylittlebottom.com • www.healthyfamiliesshenandoah.com • www.healthyfamiliesnsv.org • www.theredwagonministry.com To contact Stephenson, e-mail her at theredwagonministry@gmail.com • Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com ]]>
Learning curve in first year is hugetag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.892182010-10-25T04:00:00Z2010-10-22T19:44:03ZAs I have often shared, my son's first birthday is coming up on Sunday.There will never be another phase of my life that's quite the same. During that first pregnancy, I read all the books, and read even more online....Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms There will never be another phase of my life that's quite the same.
During that first pregnancy, I read all the books, and read even more online. I prepared the nursery -- right down to each little sleeper organized by size in his closet. I daydreamed, talked to other mothers. I compared different kinds of diapers, routines, car seats. I decided what kind of mother I wanted to be. I developed my own image of what motherhood will be like, ignoring those who told me nothing ever goes as planned.
Then the baby arrived.
Resisting the urge to launch into another sentimental trip down memory lane (as I have been doing in my head all month), I thought this week I'd simply share some of the things I figured out in a year of being a mom:
• Pee and poo are part of life. Sometimes, they can even amaze you with their ability to shoot through the air and with their vast variety of textures and colors.
• Babies just don't get that there are 24 hours in a day. And just when you think there is a routine, they change it on you.
• It is possible to nurse a baby and eat a Whopper -- simultaneously -- if you're both hungry enough.
• The term "runny nose" isn't always sufficient. When I read about babies having cold symptoms while teething, I was not at all prepared how much a nose really can resemble a faucet.
• Messes happen. Two years ago if someone spilled a bowl of chili all over my carpet, I would lose it. When my son grabbed the edge of the bowl just enough to tip it, I was only happy he wasn't burned.
• A baby can reach, crawl and climb more than you think, and they usually do it the minute you aren't looking. I think babies might even have the instinctive ability to climb stairs. On top of that, mine has the added bonus of being able to climb to a stand from just about any seated, strapped-in position, including in high chairs and shopping carts.
• There's no need to waste too much money on toys. Things like washcloths, vacuum attachments, cardboard paper towel tubes and remote controls will enthrall a baby for hours. • There will never be a shortage of women to say "Oh, I wish my baby was still that age." This will make you worry about what older babies must be like.
• It's always impossible to imagine the next stage, but somehow, we always manage. I remember looking at my little boy's smooth-gummed smile and thinking, "He'll look weird with teeth." I remember not being able to imagine him actually clapping along when I sing "Pat-a-cake" or what it would sound like when he laughed or even spoke.
And see, there, I've done it.
I guess that's another key lesson you figure out quickly: When you're a parent, you might as well count on being sentimental.
Happy birthday, son, you make life more entertaining than I could ever have imagined.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Buying for first baby is difficulttag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.872212010-10-11T04:00:00Z2010-10-12T13:39:23ZBy about this time last year, I had mostly gotten through what was, for me, one of the most difficult parts of being pregnant for the first time: shopping.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms A co-worker of mine got a chuckle out of it recently when I mentioned that during my pregnancy I (no lie) developed an Excel spreadsheet for my list of "baby needs."
Looking back on the list now is a little humorous. I had four columns: the item; the status of the item with choices for have, need, on registry, etc.; the category of the item, such as bath, travel, feeding, toys; and where to get the item.
I had everything on the list, from paint for the nursery to teethers, socks, baby wipes, crib sheets, baby nail clippers and a stroller. Moreover, I didn't just know I needed a stroller, I researched all the different types and brands of strollers, and prices, too.
For the car seat, I read online reviews, and scoured safety studies. I knew I had to have the most affordable, best-rated one available. I looked at which stores sold the seats and which stores sold them for less. I looked at all the different color schemes offered by that brand. I did this for pretty much every baby item I thought I needed.
I know, I know. I can look back on it now and laugh. I can tell all the veteran parents out there, "You were right, it all works out in the end and nothing goes as perfectly as you plan." But, given it all to do over again, I would do the exact same thing.
Something happens to you when you become responsible for a precious little life. That baby is yours to keep safe and make happy.
So it's the least we can do, to do it all the best we can.
Sure, maybe most parents don't resort to spreadsheets. But we do constantly have our kids' best interest in mind. From the car seats and highchairs they sit in, to the food we feed them, what is best for our kid is our decision to make.
Unfortunately, we also have to depend on others for our children's well-being, at least a little. As you've seen in the headlines, some of the most-trusted, well-known brands have been plagued with recalls lately -- from Children's Tylenol and Benadryl to more recently Similac and Fisher-Price.
Not only have these recalls been so prevalent, they can be shocking. Similac's powdered formula was recalled because of the presence of beetles in one area of a manufacturing plant, as I'm sure you've heard by now.
It's downright scary that even when we think we've done all the research and made the best choices for our babies, we actually can be putting them in danger.
I could commend the companies. At least they came forward. At least they are getting these contaminated or dangerous products off the shelves. I'd like to believe they're looking out for our little ones, too.
But in reality, producing children's products, be they medicines, toys or formula, is primarily just a business to these companies. When we're looking at what is safest, they're looking at the bottom line.
No one else on earth is or ever will look out for the best interests of children as much as their parents.
If that makes me seem a little over-the-top sometimes, then I can live with that.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com ]]>
Let 'em watch MTVtag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.858952010-10-04T04:00:00Z2010-10-01T20:31:08ZThey're thin, tan, have perfect hair and grace the covers of magazines -- almost weekly now, it seems.
Of course, they aren't your typical supermodels. They usually have a toddler on their hips, and they're still teenagers.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms Of course, they aren't your typical supermodels. They usually have a toddler on their hips, and they're still teenagers.
I thought at first that the MTV reality show "16 and Pregnant" and its spin-off, "Teen Mom," were only so popular in my own circle because most of my friends are going through the prime child-rearing years. We are all either pregnant or new moms ourselves, and if not, at least having children is on the radar.
Then I started seeing the girls I follow every week on newsstands and nightly entertainment news programs.
Somewhere between struggling with high school and pregnancy and signing up to have cameras follow them around constantly, these girls became bona fide celebrities. I know what you're thinking: How dare MTV? Glorifying teen pregnancy. Girls everywhere will see these pretty teen moms and think it'd be a great idea to have a baby themselves. Well, I beg to differ.
"Teen Mom" should be required viewing, maybe even starting in the pre-teen years. The show chronicles four of the girls who were originally featured on "16 and Pregnant" as they wade their way through parenting and becoming adults themselves.
With my son tucked safely in his crib last week, I tuned in from my own bed at 10 p.m. for my weekly guilty pleasure and sat up, mouth agape, about halfway through the episode, shocked by what I was seeing.
Amber, whose on-again, off-again relationship with her baby's daddy is a major plot line for the show, started yet another fight with him, but this time she punched, slapped and kicked him, cussing all the while, right in front of her daughter.
Their scenes have featured plenty of yelling and even some shirt grabbing. Until this point, I'd mostly found it entertaining. But this, it was full-on domestic violence.
It highlights why I think parents should be more than supportive of letting their own kids watch the show: This is anything but glamorous stuff. Glorifying teen parenthood? Hardly.
Just in this one episode, two of the teen parents, Catelynn and Tyler, learned they wouldn't graduate from high school with their peers because of all the classes they'd missed due to the pregnancy. They, by the way, are the only couple still together. They were also the only ones to give up their daughter for adoption, which has brought on its own set of issues for them to deal with.
Farrah, another of the show's stars, struggles with financial problems while juggling school and being a single mom. In one scene, she broke down because it'd been a year since her baby's daddy died in a car crash and she hasn't found a worthy guy who is willing to date a girl with a baby.
Maci, the fourth teen mom, is in the middle of a custody battle with her own ex-fiance. Having a baby about the same age as those these moms are caring for, I can attest that being a parent at any age isn't easy. There are always doctor visits, expenses, messes and emotions.
But I can also say that my experience -- starting about a decade later and with a stable relationship, income and household -- has been a world different than the roller coaster I watch on TV.
I have no doubt that these young women love their children, and that there are plenty of teen moms, even in our area, I'm sure, who love and take wonderful care of their kids. But I'm also sure they'd tell any other teenager willing to listen, just to wait. Be responsible now and save pregnancy for later.
It just so happens that with the teen moms on TV, their actions are more powerful than words.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Recipe time has arrivedtag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.834272010-09-20T05:00:00Z2010-09-17T20:31:47ZDriving into Strasburg on a recent sunny morning, I looked at the mountains and out of nowhere there it was. The leaves had started turning. Fall.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms In the days that have followed, the wind has picked up and the temperatures have dipped, giving us some much needed relief from a scorching summer.
Signs are everywhere that a new season is under way. The kids are off to school again. Fall festivals are coming up, along with pumpkin patches and corn mazes -- and for us here at the Daily, it'll soon be time for one of the most fun office traditions of the year: the Restaurants & Recipes contest.
Each year we ask you, the readers, to send in your best recipes for appetizers, breads, side dishes, soups/salads, desserts and main dishes. They sort through them all downstairs to pick the best candidates in each category. Then the real fun begins.
Those of us who volunteer get a sneak peek (without seeing who submitted them, of course) at all the top recipes and take one home to test out. We cook them up -- exactly how you tell us to -- and bring them all back the next day for a luncheon where we sample a little bit of each recipe and pick our top three. The highest vote getters win the contest, with no small reward. First place this year gets a dinner for two at the Dancing Goat and a night's stay at the George Washington Hotel. Second place gets $50 to spend at Joe's Steakhouse in Woodstock, and third place gets a $50 certificate to Tall Oaks Nursery in Mt. Jackson.
We announce the winners and print all the recipes in a special section that comes out at the end of October.
Last year all my co-workers went gaga for Marie Beulke's Grape Salad. I made a chili recipe that I was partial to, but I voted for Texas Caviar. One recipe that became the talk of the office came straight from the Warren County Jail -- Jailhouse Pizza. My favorite recipe of all, however, was 2007's first-place winner, Kay Hamman's Pumpkin Dump Cake. I've made this recipe every Thanksgiving since and I'm sure it's found a place as part of my own family's holiday baking traditions.
You can view past years' recipes -- including the dump cake and tons of other desserts, dips and more -- on our website at www.nvdaily.com/recipes, and submit your entries for this year's contest there through Oct. 1. There's also a form running in the paper with all the details.
And, while this will be the seventh consecutive year we've put on the contest, we're doing something new this time: Children can submit their own kid-friendly recipes for publication in the tab, though they won't be judged.
Be sure to check out the recipes and submit your own favorites for a chance to win. I'm looking forward to making one of them myself -- maybe I can even let my own kid try some this time.
And look for the section at the end of October. I'm sure it will have some gems worth adding to your own recipe box.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
An expert weighs in on snackstag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.822402010-09-13T05:00:00Z2010-09-10T20:43:23ZAs my son got a little older and his palate expanded to finger foods, one thing I started paying more attention to while out and about was the snacking habits of other tots.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms After years and years of not seeing where the highchairs are in restaurants, or if there is a changing table in the restroom, these things suddenly have an important place in your life.
After having my son I realized really quickly that there are pregnant bellies and tiny toddlers -- which I never paid any mind to before -- everywhere.
As my son got a little older and his palate expanded to finger foods, one thing I started paying more attention to while out and about was the snacking habits of other tots.
One thing stood out: From friends' highchair photos to conversations with other parents, a single snack in a cylindrical container seemed to dominate.
Look around and you'll see them, scattered around the floor underneath any table where a wee one has recently had a meal.
They are popularly referred to as "puffs," and there are several variations. Gerber Graduates makes several flavors, and store brands at Wal-Mart, Martin's, Food Lion and Target do, too. An organic version is on the shelves at several stores.
From blueberry to sweet potato to banana and peach mango, puffs claim to dissolve easier in little mouths than a crunchier grown-up cereal so they are safer for babies learning to self-feed.
I saw them all over the place and babies seemed to gobble them up.
I held off, worried that puffs would start my son on the road to junk food earlier than I wanted. I stuck with mostly home-pureed veggies and fruits and offered him little pieces of avocado and banana.
Those foods proved too slippery for his little fingers.
Eventually I started browsing puffs labels, and I began to realize that while they might not offer the most nutrition, they aren't exactly loaded with sugar either. I guess they're called puffs for a reason: They seem primarily to consist of air.
I gave in and let him have some, and he scooped them up eagerly by the fistful.
When he got a little better at eating, I started hearing that Cheerios were a better choice, so I started label reading again.
I checked out the Cheerios website and found they clearly market their products to kids, even offering the original version in a container strikingly similar to the ones for puffs. I also found the nutrition information to be comparable to puffs. Switch to multigrain or another flavor, though, and the sugar content goes up considerably.
Still not clear on which would win the battle for better baby snack, I consulted an expert. Melinda Johnson, a registered dietitian and spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association, specializes in child nutrition.
She looked into the issue and declared Cheerios the winner. The ingredients list for Cheerios starts with whole grain oats as opposed to rice flour in puffs, she pointed out. Cheerios also have a little fiber and protein, and puffs have none, she wrote in an e-mail.
Puffs aren't all bad though. They aren't much higher in sugar, she said.
She also offered some common sense advice: "It really isn't necessary to count grams of added sugar, especially if you are simply focusing on feeding your child fresh, whole foods rather than processed foods or snack-type foods."
I'm sure those are words we all could stand to live by.
• Contact Jessica Wiant at jwiant@nvdaily.com. ]]>
Puffs vs. Cheeriostag:www.nvdaily.com,2010:/moms//186.816922010-09-09T16:30:40Z2010-09-09T16:42:43ZWhich do you think is the better snack for babies, puffs or Cheerios? What are some of the finger foods you've offered your child or grandchild?
I'm planning on tackling the topic in Monday's column, but in the meantime, I'd love to hear your side.Jessica Wianthttp://www.nvdaily.com/moms I'm planning on tackling the topic in Monday's column, but in the meantime, I'd love to hear your side. ]]>